There are certain gifts that are likely to harm those who obtain them, and, in the case of these, the benefit consists, not in giving, but in withholding, them; we shall therefore consider the advantage rather than the desire of the petitioner. For we often crave things that are harmful, and we are not able to discern how destructive they are because our judgment is hampered by passion; but, when the desire has subsided, when that frenzied impulse, which puts prudence to rout, has passed, we loathe the givers of the evil gifts for the destruction they have wrought. As we withhold cold water from the sick, and the sword from those who are stricken with grief and the rage of self-destruction, as we withhold from the insane everything that they could use against themselves in a fit of frenzy, so, in general, to those who petition for gifts that will be harmful we shall persistently refuse them although they make earnest and humble, sometimes even piteous, request. It is right to keep in view, not merely the first effects, but the outcome, of our benefits, and to give those that it is a pleasure, not merely to receive, but to have received. For there are many who say, “I know that this will not be to his advantage, but what can I do? He begs for it, and I cannot resist his entreaties. It is his own look-out — he will blame himself, not me.” No, you are wrong — you are the one he will blame, and rightly so. When he comes to his right mind, when the frenzy that inflamed his soul has subsided, how can he help hating the one who helped to put him in the way of harm and danger? It is cruel kindness to yield to requests that work the destruction of those who make them. Just as it is a very noble act to save the life of a man, even against his will and desire, so to lavish upon him what is harmful, even though he begs for it, is but hatred cloaked by courtesy and civility. Let the benefit that we give be one that will become more and more satisfying by use, one that will never change into an evil. I will not give a man money if I know that it will be handed over to an adulteress, nor will I allow myself to become a partner in dishonor, actual or planned; if I can, I will restrain crime, if not, I will not aid it. Whether a man is being driven by anger in a direction that he ought not to take, or is being turned from the safe course by a burning ambition, I shall not permit him to draw from me myself the power to work any harm, nor allow it to be possible for him to act at any future time: “That man has ruined me by his love.” Often there is no difference between the favors of our friends and the prayers of our enemies; into the ills that the latter desire may befall us, the former by their inopportune kindness drive us, and provide the means. Yet, often as it happens, what can be more disgraceful than that there should be no difference between beneficence and hatred?