Others speak worst of those who have treated them best. It is safer to offend some men than to have done them a service; for, in order to prove that they owe nothing, they have recourse to hatred. And yet nothing ought to be made more manifest than that services rendered to us linger in our memory, but the memory must constantly be renewed; for only the man who remembers is able to repay gratitude, and he who remembers does thereby repay it.
In receiving a benefit we should appear neither fastidious nor yet submissive and humble; for, if anyone shows indifference in the act of receiving it, when the whole benefit is freshly revealed, what will he do when the first pleasure in it has cooled? One man receives it disdainfully, as if to say: “I really do not need it, but since you so much wish it, I will surrender my will to yours”; another accepts listlessly,so that he leaves the bestower doubtful about his being conscious of the benefit; still another barely opens his lips, and shows himself more ungrateful than if he had kept silent.
The greater the favor, the more earnestly must we express ourselves, resorting to such compliments as: “You have laid more, people under obligation than you think” (for every one rejoices to know that a benefit of his extends farther than he thought); “you do not know what it is that you have bestowed upon me, but you have a right to know how much more it is than you think” (he who is overwhelmed shows gratitude forthwith); “I shall never be able to repay to you my gratitude, but, at any rate, I shall not cease from declaring everywhere that I am unable to repay it.”